January 2025
Raising a child is an endless series of firsts, and camp brings LOTS of first experiences. Even if it’s not your kid’s first time ever going to camp, it might be their first time going to this camp, or being in that age group, or not going the same week as their BFF, or staying overnight, or any number of little differences that can make each week of camp new and exciting…and also potentially anxiety-provoking.
How does camp affect children’s mental health? What does it mean when kids—or parents—feel anxious about camp, and how can we navigate those feelings in a healthy way? For insights, we spoke with Jenny Robb, PhD, a clinical psychologist who serves children, adolescents, and adults at Pine State Psychological Services, PLLC in Raleigh.
What are some pros and cons of camp in terms of a child’s development and mental well-being?
Robb: There’s no one-size-fits-all, but in general we know that camps can be great for kids’ mental health, giving them opportunities to have more independence, experience new things, and get a chance to practice their social skills in an environment that’s a little bit different. It can be a great opportunity for them to gain confidence in themselves and learn that they can do things on their own.
“Camps can be great for kids’ mental health, giving them opportunities to have more independence, experience new things, and get a chance to practice their social skills.”
Jenny Robb, PhD
When it comes to negatives, there might be some anxiety for parents in sending their kids to camp, but that is a challenge that can be overcome. Some parents are also concerned about [their child experiencing] homesickness or anxiety at camp and see that as a con, but it isn’t strictly a bad thing—it can actually be an opportunity for their kid to learn to cope with something different.
What if my child is feeling anxious about going to camp?
Robb: Let them know that it’s okay to feel nervous. A lot of people feel nervous when they do something for the first time, and that doesn’t mean it’s not going to go well. Sometimes kids and adults can interpret feelings of nervousness or anxiety as a sign that they need to escape or avoid something, and that’s not always what our anxiety is communicating. Sometimes we need to be able to notice, I’m feeling nervous, but that doesn’t mean I’m in danger—it means I’m doing something for the first time. It’s okay to feel nervous and still do the thing.
“Let them know that it’s okay to feel nervous. A lot of people feel nervous when they do something for the first time, and that doesn’t mean it’s not going to go well.”
Jenny Robb, PhD
How can I know when to push my child beyond their comfort zone and when to back off?
Robb: This is tricky, and that line is probably at a different spot for different families and different kids. There are some obvious things, for instance if your child is in actual physical danger or emotional danger, they absolutely need to be removed from that situation. If a parent has really serious concerns about a big meltdown or severe anxiety that’s really impairing their kid’s ability to do something that they want or need to be able to do, that would be a good time to consult with a professional. But for kids in general, if they’re feeling some level of anxiety, it’s good to try to push them a little bit toward that rather than immediately taking them out of that situation.
As adults, we have to push through our anxiety all the time, whether it’s for a work presentation or trying to make a new friend. For our children, it’s the same. They need to be able to go toward things that make them anxious instead of always running away from it. You can think about camp similar to the first day of school. There are kids who have a hard time on the first day of school, but if we let them come home every day instead of staying at school, they never get the opportunity to learn that they are going to be okay.
It can be hard to see your kid struggling and feeling anxious. As parents, we also have to practice tolerating our kids’ negative emotions and knowing that just because our child is having a hard time with something doesn’t mean we have to rescue them from that, because they need to learn to be able to cope. We want to give them this opportunity to learn that they can deal with this feeling and form positive experiences.
How can I help prepare my child to have a good experience at camp?
Robb: Anytime we’re doing something new for our kid, it can be good to give them some expectations of what it might be like, and not set it up too high or too low. Give some realistic expectations of what camp is going to be like, maybe go on the website and look at some pictures together […] talk with them about where they’re going to be sleeping, what meals are going to be like, what activities they might get the chance to do, just so that they have an understanding of what’s going to happen.
“Try to approach camp with positivity and get excited about it together.”
Jenny Robb, PhD
Try to approach camp with positivity and get excited about it together. It can be tempting to ask your kid, “Are you nervous?” Instead of focusing on these negative emotions, try to ask more open-ended questions like “How do you feel about going to camp?” “What are you looking forward to?” or “What questions do you have?”
What questions do YOU have about navigating camp decisions and helping your child benefit from the experience? Add your ideas in the comments!
For more on camp and child development, check out our conversation with an expert on the Science of Summer Camp.
Leave a Reply